dear blog,

i haven't wrote you in awhile, and i think it's time i vented.
there's a ton to explain so imma just rip right through it all...

i met a boy on myspace through a friend and we started talking and saying how he's interested in me and shit and he seemed cool we decided to meet and go to the beach and we made out a lot which i didn't expect cause we were jsut friends. and we did other unmentionable things and skinyn dipped and idunno why i didnd't it i went againast every single thing i stand for about self-respect and i just totally gave my body away like a slut. so after we did that and stuff we admitted we liked each other but he didn't wanna be in a relationship. i was okay with that until he went and fucked this other dude right after he told me what he told me... wtf. that's not cool. so in an attemtp to ruin his love life with the other dude for leading me on, i told the other dude everything me and the guy did at the beach. =] it stirred up a bunch of drama, thank god. he deserved it, stupid piece of filth. i'm over him though, he really wasn't worth my time. so moving on. my bff found a guy whom i thought would be good. she's just too damn shy! i tried my best to convince her that i'll be there and it would be fine but she won't go for it and idunno why. seriously girl, were in our youth you gotta try out new things. if you don't you'll never learn. that pisses me off so bad. when two people you KNOW should be together, aren't. so as always... i meddled. and it made everyone get into a little fight. woooo. god i need to learn to keep my nose in my own business. so. i met this guy and again, we were interested in each other, blahblahblah. and of course i fell for it. then he deleted me form his friends list, stops texting me outta no where, and won't talk to me at all. and you know why? he had a fucking boyfriend. he lead me on completely. oh well, my fault for believing we actually had a chance. oh. and i met this guy named al. this was like bback in june. i went to akron to meet him and he was boring as fuck. ugh. waste of gas.

my god. i've become such an easy slut and i hate it.
no more boys.
no more shit.
no more slut.
i'm going back to my old days.
where i only made out with people and believed in everything.

...

so. the point to all this blogging and venting?
come on kids... we're 15, 16, 17... whatever.
we're in our youth.
we don't need to find love so fast.
why is there so much pressure on us to have boyfriends and girlfriends?
we have our WHOLE LIVES to find love.
why do we have to find it now?
when we can be having fun, trying new things, and living up our youth before it's wasted?
not to sound negative, though.
i really don't understand...